Faking It

Last week a friend and I were talking about this post, musing about life, honest struggle, etc. A few days later, the friend sent this piece to me. I read it and immediately  asked if I could share it on the blog. Permission was granted - anonymously - so here we are, the first guest post!

I don't really know where to start when it comes to sledge hammering heart walls that have been built up for years, but I'm betting prayer (knees to the ground crying out kind of prayer) is a great place to start. Beyond that I think the next step is action. I often expect my prayers to magically fix everything while I sit around and watch as if I'm not an active participant in change. That's a problem. I need to pray and act. Being idle isn't going to help. Prayer and action. Prayer and intentional reconciliation. Prayer and conversation. It's time to let go of the fear of being known. 

If I'm being honest, I can't tell the difference between real and fake in my life anymore. It's painful - to be "real". To give others the power to break you, so as a result I have become complacent. Living my life on the surface and creating relationships of convenience instead of depth. I choose safe, comfortable, and easy instead of different and potentially painful - and yet I expect to grow?