"Do not be deceived, God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please the flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction. Whoever sows to please the spirit, from the spirit will reap eternal life." - Gal. 6:7-8
9/22/12
In living I stand at an impasse. My mind and soul have thoroughly steeped in proofs and experiences of Christianity. I've attended countless classes and retreats then examined and tried to live other worldviews. Nothing else makes sense logically. Emotionally, everything else leaves me narcissistic and wretched or empty and hopeless. I see the Christian ideal, how it might be - fulfilling my purpose in relationship with God - and it's beautiful. Like I wrote before, I've seen, I've felt, I've tasted; I took a jump of faith, found solid rock on the other side. Revolutionary, yet nothing new for far too many. I think this entry will shake that a bit.
Like everyone, I've failed so much over the past years; so many times I've hit the snooze button through devos, so many times I did something else instead of spend time with God. So many times I've chosen games or girls, or who knows what else. And of course, I soon would find myself sorry and guilty. I'd get some time with God, and everything would be alright again. Until I messed up, then went back, and messed up, repeat ad nausem. But something's not working any more.